Reflecting

As we draw closer to the end of the year we (maybe it’s just me) we start to make lists/resolutions for the new year.

Me, well I mostly try and figure out what happened that I find myself in December of 2016 already, it was January like yesterday.

Anyhow along with lists and reflections we tend to place all our mishaps under intense scrutiny and judgement. 2016 has by no means been easy, but we easily look over the good things we’ve accomplished.

One of my New Years resolutions is always to lose weight, I also tend to beat myself up quite badly when that doesn’t pan out the way I want it.

I have come across a few people hating on themselves for not accomplishing great things this year.

Today I want to say, stop sweating the small stuff. Yes some of it is not always small. But look at what you have achieved.

You’ve made it through 2017 alive. You are here? You might not look the way you want but you’ve grown. You’ve become stronger, you’ve got to know yourself a little better. If you are a mother you’ve had the privilege to spend another year with your child(ren).

So yes, I might not have lost the weight I wanted. I might not have saved as much as I intended and my debt is pretty much still a black hole sucking my soul dry but what have I achieved?

I am happy, for the first time in almost 3 years I am happy. Yes I am still on medication but my dosages hasn’t increased. My psychiatry appointments are every 6 months and I actually laugh at my appointments instead of sobbing through the session.

My husband is still my rock, my safety and sanity. He still takes my breath away and is the one person that can make me laugh at things a little more than what is socially acceptable.

I have seen my daughter blossom into a little human that has so many unique traits while at the same time exhibiting so many of my own (and the husband’s) She teaches me so much daily and I overlook that so easily.

I have made peace with my body. (This has been a bitter pill to swallow) I have realized that self love is crucial before any change will come.

I’ve learnt that journaling and exercise can be a saving grace. Meditation is way underrated and sometimes you just need to take a nap.

So yes this year my resolutions will include all the usual but I will also be focusing a lot more on the nice.

xCx

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