Happy 20 uhm 18

Life is racing at Mach speed and it feels like I literally need to hold on to something grounded to prevent myself from getting whiplash. Wasn’t it 2014 like 5 seconds ago?Perhaps it isn’t that bad, perhaps my brain has just been set to cruise mode for the past 3 odd years. What I have […]

Mind over matter

Sitting on the couch, after eating what feels like double my weight in delectably divine food, there’s a tad of despair that this year is drawing to a close. With about 4 days left until 2018 I feel a bit flurried as to what to do?

Do I; “make the last few days count”?

Do I; “slug along and start again in 2018?”

As much as I want to stand on the roof top and be that person to shout from the top my lungs to live every single second and end 2017 with the biggest bang ever, I am not THAT person, I am however going to say this;

How about just being mindful?

Mindfulness

  1. noun
    1. the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.
    2. “their mindfulness of the wider cinematic tradition”
    3. a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

How about for the next few days we stop overthinking?  What if we stop looking for the perfect Instagram picture, or thinking about the perfect tweet or caption for that picture and just be. Be conscious and aware and then of course keep practicing this through 2018. (Yes I know it probably sounds like I’ve stepped out of the early 90’s but was it that bad?)

We love to say that you only live once and that time is such a cruel mistress or bed fellow {or what ever time is referred to.} Yet we wish it to pass and then on top of that we tend to waste it on the most obscure things. I am in no way one to talk, I spend way to much time on my phone and even when I am not on my phone I have the lingering thought at the back of my mind about what is going on on my phone.

In a time where it’s never been easier to be connected, we have never been more disconnected. We cherish the people on our phones, we speak to the “crowds” who listen with eager anticipation at whatever our keyboards spew onto their screens and praise every word as if it is a religion.

We are the brainwashed generation too wrapped up in our little smart devices to realize that there is a world outside.

Now don’t get me wrong, as with anything in life there is a time and place for everything. There are bloggers and brand influencers as well as enthusiasts that work very hard at what they do, and do it brilliantly. Yet there is a very fine, yet distinct line that needs to be drawn.

Let’s be more mindful the last few days of 2017 and carry this into 2018. The world needs more present people (and less techno zombies)

 

Reflecting

As we draw closer to the end of the year we (maybe it’s just me) we start to make lists/resolutions for the new year.

Me, well I mostly try and figure out what happened that I find myself in December of 2016 already, it was January like yesterday.

Anyhow along with lists and reflections we tend to place all our mishaps under intense scrutiny and judgement. 2016 has by no means been easy, but we easily look over the good things we’ve accomplished.

One of my New Years resolutions is always to lose weight, I also tend to beat myself up quite badly when that doesn’t pan out the way I want it.

I have come across a few people hating on themselves for not accomplishing great things this year.

Today I want to say, stop sweating the small stuff. Yes some of it is not always small. But look at what you have achieved.

You’ve made it through 2017 alive. You are here? You might not look the way you want but you’ve grown. You’ve become stronger, you’ve got to know yourself a little better. If you are a mother you’ve had the privilege to spend another year with your child(ren).

So yes, I might not have lost the weight I wanted. I might not have saved as much as I intended and my debt is pretty much still a black hole sucking my soul dry but what have I achieved?

I am happy, for the first time in almost 3 years I am happy. Yes I am still on medication but my dosages hasn’t increased. My psychiatry appointments are every 6 months and I actually laugh at my appointments instead of sobbing through the session.

My husband is still my rock, my safety and sanity. He still takes my breath away and is the one person that can make me laugh at things a little more than what is socially acceptable.

I have seen my daughter blossom into a little human that has so many unique traits while at the same time exhibiting so many of my own (and the husband’s) She teaches me so much daily and I overlook that so easily.

I have made peace with my body. (This has been a bitter pill to swallow) I have realized that self love is crucial before any change will come.

I’ve learnt that journaling and exercise can be a saving grace. Meditation is way underrated and sometimes you just need to take a nap.

So yes this year my resolutions will include all the usual but I will also be focusing a lot more on the nice.

xCx

FOMO-The unnamed toddler curse

      I honestly think my darling daughter suffers from FOMO. So if you are old school like me, FOMO is an acronym that stands for Fear of Missing Out. According to Wikipedia it is  “a pervasive apprehension that others might be having rewarding experiences from which one is absent”.  (Not to be confused […]

My struggle with postpartum depression

It’s taken me two years, 7 months, 5 days and a lot of courage to finally share my postpartum experience. I know that every type of funk that comes with postpartum depression is equally as awful due to the anxiety, extreme sadness, fear and rage that accompanies it. I also have mentioned before that I […]

Keeping cool

Things I’ve learnt about myself in the last week. I have a lot more patience than I give myself credit for. Mila has been having the WORST tantrums. Think feral child meets gremlin that gets wet with screeches resembling that of an annoyed banshee. And it’s been going like this for probably 4 days now, at […]